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- A highly sensitive person (HSP) is someone who feels emotions and sensations more intensely.
- They also tend to be more empathetic, sensitive to physical sensations, and need time to recharge.
- To cope with being an HSP, make sure to set boundaries and work on emotional regulation.
If you feel like you feel more deeply than the average person, you may be a highly sensitive person, or HSP. Being an HSP isn't just about feeling emotions strongly, though – it's also about responding more sensitively to various stimuli.
The concept of highly sensitive people was popularized by psychologist Elaine Aron PhD, who was a pioneer in researching the phenomenon in the '90s. She estimates that 15% to 20% of the population are HSPs.
Here's what it means to be a highly sensitive person, signs that you might be one, and how to cope.
What is a highly sensitive person?
"A highly sensitive person (HSP) is a person who tends to feel emotions, sensations, and perceptions of the world more strongly than the average person," says Katie Fracalanza, a clinical psychologist and clinical assistant professor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Stanford University School of Medicine.
This can lead you to feel painful emotions or negative stimuli more intensely than the average person, and on the flipside, experience pleasant emotions and stimuli more strongly, too, Fracalanza.
Brain scans have helped researchers better understand the biological mechanisms of being an HSP:
- A 2014 study found that HSPs experienced increased activation in the parts of the brain related to awareness, empathy, planning, and sensory information
- A 2021 study discovered that HSPs may have weaker connections between areas of the brain that regulate stress, emotions, and pain, which may contribute to why they often experience anxiety and overstimulation.
Being an HSP is not considered a mental illness or disorder, rather it simply describes a group of traits and experiences you may have. "The value in labeling it is to help those who might experience the constellation of symptoms to validate their experiences throughout their lifetime," says David H. Klemanski, PsyD, a psychologist at Yale Medicine and assistant professor at Yale School of Medicine.
When this is acknowledged, HSPs have a better chance to understand their unique way of experiencing the world and learn how to manage their sensitivities, Klemanski says.
The stimuli that affect HPS may be internal or external. HSPs have stronger reactions to both inner cues, like pain or complex thoughts, and external cues, like noise, light, or other people, says Klemanski.
The term highly sensitive person is basically synonymous with sensory processing sensitivity (SPS), Klemanski says. It's attributed to deeper thought processing, stronger emotional reactivity, and overstimulation.
Essentially, SPS means that the person has greater awareness of details in their surroundings, their emotions and others' emotions, and subtleties that less sensitive people may miss, says Fracalanza.
Like being an HSP, SPS is not considered a disorder. "We all vary in how sensitive we are. It's a trait, much like height. Just as some people are taller than average, some people are more sensitive than average," Fracalanza says.
The signs of a highly sensitive person
Every highly sensitive person has unique and varying traits. Some of the most common are as follows:
1. You experience emotions deeply: You might notice that you have intense feelings, both positive and negative, and that you feel them more deeply than the average person. "You may cry easily during a touching or sad movie, profoundly appreciate the awe of natural beauty, or be highly moved by art or music," says Fracalanza.
2. You experience physical sensations intensely: You may be hyper-aware of physical sensations, which can make you feel more aware of loud sounds, unpleasant textures, or bright lights, Fracalanza says. This may lead you to feel overstimulated and uncomfortable in places that are noisy, crowded, or bright. Additionally, if you're hyper-aware of textures, you may prefer to only wear soft, comfortable clothing.
3. You think deeply: HSPs are thought of as high processors since they not only take in more information than most people, but they also consider it in detail, says Fracalanza. This may cause you to take longer to make decisions, or to prefer doing things carefully one at a time versus multitasking.
4. You're extremely empathetic: "Super-feelers pick up on others' emotions quickly and easily. They can 'feel' what others are feeling in a sense," says Fracalanza. This may be due to HSPs having more mirror neuron activity, which is linked to empathy.
5. You prefer to do things slowly: HSPs pick up information and process it deeply. "They tend to prefer to move at their own pace as opposed to being rushed so that they can make sense of all their system is bringing in," says Fracalanza.
6. You need more time to recharge: Since HSPs feel emotions and sensations more than others, they tend to become tired or overstimulated easily. "HSPs may need lots of downtime, time alone, or rest after engaging in stimulating or social activities. Highly sensitive folks can feel overwhelmed when they do not give themselves time to recharge or when in situations where adequate rest is not possible" says Fracalanza.
How to cope with being a highly sensitive person
At times, it can be very difficult to be a highly sensitive person, since some situations can be extremely overstimulating, and emotions can easily take over. Here are eight ways to cope:
1. Give yourself adequate downtime
Taking breaks for downtime is crucial when you're feeling overstimulated. "Taking breaks, having a wind-down period after being around people or working, and having long periods of unstructured time can be extremely helpful to maintain your sense of balance," says Fracalanza. The ideal break will look different for every person and their unique needs.
Some people may need more downtime than others. If possible, try to give yourself a break whenever you feel overstimulated, even if it's just a mini-break. You don't want to wait until you are extremely overwhelmed to take a break –– do it before you reach your breaking point. During your break, you may want to:
- Be alone
- Get away from loud noises or bright lights
- Practice self-soothing
2. Manage your environment
While you can't always control your environment, it's possible to manage environments such as your home or your workspace so they are conducive to comfort and productivity, says Klemanski. This may mean keeping your space free of bright lights, loud noises, and clutter, for example.
3. Practice paced breathing
Paced breathing can help regulate an HSP's sensitive nervous system and reduce feeling overwhelmed in chaotic situations, Fracalanza says. To practice paced breathing, Fracalanza recommends the following steps:
1. Breathe in for five seconds
2. Hold the breath for two seconds
3. Breathe out for eight seconds
4. Hold for two seconds
5. Repeat the process for a period of two to ten minutes, or when you start to feel more calm
4. Stress management
Since HSPs can get easily overwhelmed by stress, Klemanski says it can be helpful to learn what works best for you to manage stress, and think about long-term mitigation strategies. Some stress management techniques are:
- Regularly exercising
- Practicing meditation
- Getting enough sleep
- Eating a healthy diet
- Reaching out to trusted loved ones
- Journaling
5. Emotional regulation
Strong emotions can easily take over and cause an HSP to get swept up. Klemanski says emotional regulation strategies can help you learn to identify and understand your emotional experience while exerting some control over how you are experiencing these feelings. Working on this with a therapist can be very helpful. A few strategies are:
- Mindfulness: This involves noticing the present moment without judgment. "Mindfulness puts a small buffer in between our thoughts and our interpretations and allows us to consider if our initial thought, feeling, or behavior was accurate or justified, or if we should amend it by taking into account the full facts of the situation. It allows us to react with intention and wisdom rather than reflexively," Klemanski says. You may also consider mindful breathing.
- Practicing self-compassion: Self-compassion means pausing to purposefully be kind to yourself. "It's easy to be hard or tough on ourselves, and we sometimes don't treat ourselves as well as we might treat friends and loved ones," Klemanski says. When you're feeling difficult emotions, remind yourself that your feelings are valid, and practice changing your critical self-talk by considering how a supportive friend might respond in that moment.
- Cognitive appraisal: Klemanski says we are always interpreting our internal and external worlds, and cognitive appraisal asks you to consider how valid your interpretations are. This helps you take a step back and look at your thoughts and feelings in a more rational way, rather than just getting swept up in emotion.
6. Cultivate a balanced life
As an HSP, you want to make sure that you aren't too bored (understimulated) or too busy and chaotic (overstimulated), Klemanski says. Finding this balance can help you find an overall sense of wellbeing. What this looks like will be different for everyone, since some people need more downtime than others.
7. Set boundaries
While you may feel guilty saying "no" to others since you are so sensitive to the needs of others, this can lead to burnout. "Practicing communicating limits with others, setting boundaries, and saying 'no' is essential to an HSP's wellbeing and continuing to have resources to give to others. You can't pour from an empty cup," says Fracalanza.
For example, this may mean turning down invitations when you are feeling too stressed and overstimulated, or telling a friend you are only able to hang out for a certain predetermined amount of time.
8. Practice self-soothing
Fracalanza recommends self-soothing your senses by exposing them to pleasant stimuli. For example:
- Cuddling up in a soft blanket
- Drinking a warm tea
- Looking at pretty pictures
- Tasting your favorite comfort foods
Insider's takeaway
A highly sensitive person reacts to internal and external stimuli more strongly than the average person.
For example, HSPs may feel emotions deeply, experience physical sensations intensely, and need plenty of time to recharge.
By acknowledging you are an HSP, you can better learn how to cope with strong and overwhelming sensations so that you can reap the benefits and enjoy being an HSP.
"Although feeling stimuli intensely can be painful at times, it can also be a superpower. When HSPs take care of themselves and honor their unique trait, they often find they're able to experience the upside of feeling strongly while minimizing the downside," says Fracalanza.